… Day at work today isn’t that strenuous, I have to work on minute tasks for the whole afternoon. It wasn’t that bad. I get to exchange thoughts with my friends at work during our usual break in the afternoon at the cafeteria. We talked about each other’s high school and college experiences. The days where freedom is a magical word used and abused. The time where we’d fall and keep coming back on same mistakes just for the heck it. We always thought we can beat all odds, face all challenges even when drunk and dancing. We had slightly different stories, from conservative upbringing, to being independent and carrying the burden of balancing right and wrong, to the dark and liberated crooked walkabouts…

It made me wonder about my role now as a father to my fast growing kids. My college girl is turning into a woman and I always wonder If I’m performing well parenting her. Ever since that moment when she asked about having a  ”boyfriend”, I felt disoriented on how I’m going to handle it. I never gave a finite reply though, thinking that a YES or a NO will impose new levels of responsibilities for both of us. Allowing may be the right thing since I may get to know the guy he’s dating but on the other hand It might give her a GO signal on venturing to the twilight zone that would endanger her studies. Not Allowing her may sever our father and daughter relationship as being friends and she may do stuffs behind my back. I’ve always been open minded but I guess on this matter, I may tend to hold back. I don’t want her to walk the path I have trod. Being a young father during those days made me realize now that I’ve missed out on some significant moments as a single individual. I want her to live a full life where she can finish college and have a decent paying job and practically enjoy a single life before embarking into a serious relationship. It’s going to be a mutual ride, she and I will take. Eventually, she’ll be taking the wheel to pursue on with her own life and undertakings and I must be able to navigate with her along this voyage and make sure she gets to her destination at the right time.

Through It all, I love my kids very much and I’m proud to be given the responsibility to be their Father…